Your Best Self

If you could be better than you are today, would you do it? Would you try to be a faster, stronger, and all around better person if giving the opportunity to transform?

Of course you would. Because that’s the human condition. We all want to be better than we are. Why else would we get up in the morning but to see what we could accomplish?

Now, what if I told you that to achieve this better self you had to give up something incredibly vital to you. Would you still do it?

Consider this, for example. You want to get healthy. Fine. So, you go to the gym a bunch of times during the week and you eat healthy and you feel great. But all that gym time cuts into your sleep so you’re staying in on weekends and not seeing your friends or grabbing dinner with them because they eat garbage. What do you do then? Stay the course, and leave your friends? Were they ever your friends if they let you just prioritize the gym over them? Or do you ditch the new you?

I don’t know the answer here. But my guess is that the thing you want most is your new priority. If that’s hanging out with your friends or the gym or whatever. Whatever you can’t live without should be your priority, even if that means you can’t be your best self. 

Because, yes, you can pressure carbon into diamonds, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you should. 

Give Them Something

Everyone gossips. Everyone. 

They’re all like:

I hear she got a nose job.

Yeah? Well, I heard she got a boob job. 

No way? I hear she has a job

And on and on. And if you think that no one gossips about you, then you’re straight up lying to yourself. Your family does it, your friends do it. Not in a bad way, just in a I want to make sure Bailey is alright because I want her to be happy and healthy – have you heard anything to the contrary kind of way. 

And so, if they’re already talking about you, why not give them something to talk about? People get so bent out of shape when people talk behind their backs, but that’s the wrong way to look at it. Let that free you. Because they’re gonna talk. If they’re going to talk about you, at least make it entertaining. Be yourself and make it fun. 

And after all, that’s how urban legends are born: from talk. My one life goal (other than to write a bestselling book) is to become an urban legend. I want everything to be like Practical Magic, where the neighborhood spreads rumors about you that you’re a witch and you probably dance naked in the moonlight and vote democrat and all that. I’m living for that day. 

So, go ahead and talk about me. But at least have something interesting to say. 

Hug Your Mom

Go ahead. Do it now. I’ll wait. 

I was going to wait to post this until later in the week but I just don’t think this is something that should ever have to wait. 

Because yeah, Mother’s Day is a good time to celebrate your mom. Take her out to lunch, buy her flowers, generally take care of her. But you should be doing that everyday. Because growing up, it was everyday that she took care of you. 

Moms are so important. And before you jump on the comments section, fathers are important too. (Their day just isn’t this Sunday, that’s all). Moms make us laugh and wipe our tears and do stuff that we don’t want to do – just to help us out. (See vacuuming up spiders, making doctor’s appointments, and oh I don’t know, wiping our own butts.) 

They deserve more than a day, but if that’s all that you have to give them, then make it count. Hug them, and kiss them, and tell them that you love them. Even if it hasn’t been awhile since they heard it. Even if it’s been forever. 

And if you don’t have a mom, or your mom isn’t with you, or your mom’s just not a person you want in your life, hug a friend’s mom. I guarantee she’ll appreciate it.

Who are you rooting for?

There’s a scene in my favorite book ever Stargirl, in which the main character becomes a cheerleader at her high school, and her classmates get mad at her when she runs to comfort a player on the other team. The narrator is so shocked that she would cross “enemy lines” that he shuns her. But all she could see was someone who was hurt, who needed help. 

Cue me being at a rugby game this weekend. Where men upon men grapple, tousle, grab, fight, jump, push, shove, sprint, and generally knock heads to get the ball. There are plenty of hurt arms, legs, and heads, but no hurt feelings in sight. 

A little boy and his mother ride over on their bikes and watch the game closely from the sidelines, not too far from me. The little boy comments, “this looks like football” to which the mom agrees. (Which was a fairly astute observation made by a little boy). 

After sitting in silence for a few moments, he finally asks his mom: “who are we rooting for?”

And I hold my breath, hoping the mom won’t answer at all. Because wouldn’t that be nice? Wouldnt that be great? If the little boy didn’t have to watch the game disliking one team just because his mom said so? That he could see that each side had people to root for and that’s good enough? 

The mom did answer, but the irony was that it was an alumni game. The alumni against the current students. So technically, it was all for fun. There really was no rivalry. And yet, for that little boy, it was made so. 

I think we need to spend more time thinking about how similar we are than how we are different. Because dividing lines can do just that: divide. And in the end, we should all be rooting for each other, no matter what team we’re on.