I know life is hard sometimes. Actually, most of the time. Ok, ok. 90% of the time.
But do you know what you need to do? No, not eat a spoonful of sugar, or sip water through a paper towel, or take a nap.
You need a good belly laugh. You need your sense of humor. You need a bright side.
If you’ve run out of options, then laugh. If you’ve taken a long look at yourself and you want to cry, try laughing. Try telling yourself a joke.
Like this one:
What do you call a wet baby owl?
A moist owlet.
Or this one:
What do you call fake spaghetti?
And so on. Until you’re laughing again. Until you’re smiling again. Until the world doesn’t seem so bad anymore.
Laughter. It’s more than the best medicine. It’s a way of life.
My favorite book on planet earth is Stargirl by Jerry Spinelli.
It’s about a high school girl that doesn’t try to fit in: she plays the ukulele, and dresses weirdly, and believes in the power of anchovies on pizza … until she doesn’t.
Her boyfriend starts to tell her that she shouldn’t do things because everyone doesn’t do that. So she comes up with the name Evelyn Everybody and continually asks if “Evelyn Everybody does that?” Does Evelyn Everybody eat anchovies on their pizza?
I just wanted to let you know that at the end of the book, (spoiler alert), she goes back to being herself. Not caring what Evelyn Everybody does or feels or acts.
So if you are scared that Evelyn Everybody doesn’t do what you do, don’t worry. You can still be you. And actually, you should be.
We all know one (or are one).
A b**** – A woman (a word mostly used for women by women) who is loud, obnoxious, arrogant, pushy, and bossy.
But have you ever noticed that women call each other b****** when they simply don’t like what they’re doing? It seems a woman can’t ever stand up for herself, a woman cannot speak her mind, a woman cannot call out the errors of others without looking like a you know what.
Well, you know what? I’m not a Starbucks barista. I’m not here to put whip cream in your latte and a smile on your heart. I don’t have to be nice all the time. I can be respectful while still getting what I want.
I don’t have to be afraid of the b word anymore. Actually, it sort of has a nice ring to it. (Maybe I should change the old blog name to b****dailey).
At the end of the day, don’t be afraid of what people think of you. Because at the end of the day, you don’t have to spend time with anyone but yourself. After all, there’s a little b**** in all of us.
If there’s an adage that I agree wholeheartedly with, it’s this one:
Ain’t nobody got time for that!
Because, indeed, nobody has time for that. Or anything. We’re always rushing to be some place and then not really being present while we’re there. We eat dinner in front of the tv to laugh tracks, we go to events just to instagram them, we count down the hours until the working day has ended.
But do you know what everyone actually has time for? To be grateful. To stop what you’re doing and look around and just take in where you are. You may notice that the sun is shining (or not), or the birds are chirping (or not), and everything is going right (or not). But be grateful for all of it. If you’re having a bad day, be grateful that most things have gone right for you, and that this day will pass. If you’re alive, you get to start over.
If you look hard enough, there’s always something to be grateful for. So stop what
you’re doing and be on the look out for it.
What are you most grateful for?
The message tonight is really simple.
Don’t force it.
I think it’s easy in life to want something so much that it hurts. That you try and try and try and try to make it fit in any way you can. It could be a relationship, a friendship, a career path, or just more food in the freezer.
But I’m here to tell you that nothing is being helped by you forcing it. Let it take its time. And most importantly, if it doesn’t work out, don’t make it fit. Some things were meant to run their course and be done. (Like that old chicken in the back of the freezer. Take it out, throw it away, be done with it.)
And by the way, you can totally be sad that it’s over. You don’t need to be happy go lucky as soon as it’s done. Don’t force that either. Just let yourself feel every emotion without judging yourself for feeling that emotion. You’ll be happier (in time).
So don’t force it. If it’s not working, there’s probably a good reason for it. After all, life is meant to be enjoyed — if you aren’t enjoying it, you’re forcing something.
So, I guess it’s song lyric week on baileydailey. But here we go …
If you’ve been a long-time baileydailey reader, you know that I commute on the train. And I see people doing everything:
Listening to music/podcasts, putting on make up, perusing magazines, reading books, talking to their neighbors, playing games on their phones, typing up reports, writing posts on social media, shopping online.
But do you know what I don’t see? At all? Anyone doing nothing at all. Just being. Just being human beings.
Actually, I see it so infrequently that people get weirded out if I’m not doing something. If I’m just sitting, looking out the window, people don’t sit next to me. Like I might just strike up a conversation, goodness forbid. Like I’m a leper for not staring at my phone. Like a normal human being should.
So, here’s your friendly reminder to just be. Be a human. And don’t worry about doing something every moment of every day. You have my permission to just be alive.
I forgot my breakfast and my lunch at home today.
I also forgot my wallet so buying food was out of the question.
And instead of heaving a deep sigh and cursing my forgetfulness, I thought, “the universe is abundant. It will share its wealth with me.” And then I sprouted wings and flew directly into the sun.
Of course I didn’t do that! What, am I some sort of deity who is immune to self-blame? I was livid with myself. A full day of work ahead of me and I couldn’t even remember to pack a few crackers? What’s wrong with me?
But I was really blessed by the universe. Maybe it’s all the millennials that work with me, but there’s always free food at my office. And I was provided with enough sustenance to make it through the day just on free food alone.
And I can’t speak for you, but sometimes you get what you want. And other, more rarer times, you get what you need. And I know, I know, it’s corny and on such a small scale that it’s almost silly. But I got what I needed on a day that nothing seemed to be going right. And I couldn’t be more grateful for that.
What are you grateful for today?
You know? It’s not the end of the world.
Even though it seems that way. Floods. Hurricanes. Donald Trump as President. Donald Trump being listened to. Donald Trump existing.
But it isn’t the end of the world. And you should remember that. Because in your darkest times, it’s important to remember that even though a problem seems big, as long as you’re breathing, you can get through it.
It’s not the end. It’s just a really hard part. You’ll get through it. Just keep going.
Oh, and don’t worry. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.
If you’re like me, there are just some days you feel like a cosmic joke. Take this, for example: I was a double major in English/Communications. During my college career, I did nothing but write and talk and explain and yup, you guessed it, communicate.
But there’s this great irony to me. Because I don’t like to talk. About myself, about the weather, about anything. I love a good conversation, as long as I can be the listening piece.
So, I have this weird dilemma that I’ve studied and practiced and worked on communicating with other people, but I never really got good at it. (At least to my own ears.)
Ordering off a menu makes me sweat into a puddle. Getting a phone call I wasn’t expecting is pure torture. Small talk makes me cringe all over.
But I think that’s a good lesson. Even if something is very hard for you, it doesn’t mean that you can’t do it. It just takes extra practice, extra concentration. And one day, it’ll come naturally.
So, let’s practice. How are you?
Do you ever wish you had a superpower? Invisibility? Ability to fly? Telepathy?
So, maybe you don’t have a superpower. But what about something you’re good at? A passion. Maybe you sing. Maybe you draw. Maybe you dance.
Me? I write. Which is basically what was in Pandora’s box when they let all the demons: its hope.
Like: I hope I get a career in writing. I hope I can write a book someday. I hope someone is reading this.
Yeah, it’s not the best superpower or the best passion. You can’t go on a competition show and write your way to fame and fortune. (You can write a mean birthday card for your friend, though.)
But it’s mine. And most days, I love writing. It’s when I’m not writing that I hate it.
So, write on. Dance on. Sing on. Draw on.
Live and love your passion.