When I was younger, I didn’t really have an opinion about anything. I was a go-with-the-flow kind of girl.

I knew war was bad, the Beatles played good music, and that I liked my burgers well done.

And that was that. Anything else, I was like, “oh, you too?! Me too!” about EVERYTHING.

Now, that I’m older, I realize that making your own opinions in life is how you shape your personality. Finding what you absolutely hate and definitely love is the best part about experiences. It’s the adventure that keeps you living!

Now, I know I like my burgers medium-well, I still hate war, and the Beatles still play good music.

Hey, I’m getting there!



Car Horns

When do you use your car horn most? When you’re trying to get someone’s attention? When you’re trying to signal to a squirrel to tell him that he should get out of the road? When you’re trying to tell someone that they’re driving wonderfully? 

No. You use it when someone is being an $#!hole. When someone cuts you off, blows through a stop sign, or if you’re a New Yorker, just because you feel like it. 

And if you’re anything like me, I’m so embarrassed when someone uses their horn on me that I mouth “sorry” as many times as I can and gesture to the driver that I didn’t mean it. It’s the one thing that always makes me feel like an idiot. 

But I’m not always being the idiot. Because people use their car horns all the time. And not always for the right reason. 

And that’s a lot like life, isn’t it? Someone can tell you that you’re doing something wrong, and you very well might be. But there are going to be times that you’re not, and that person is going to continue to make you feel like an idiot. And it can be really hard to ignore that.  Sometimes, you really value that person’s opinion.

But just because that person has an opinion, just like car horns, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re using it at the right time or that they even have the right to exert their influence over you. 

You should always remember that others are going to try to get you to stay in line. They’re going to make fun of you, and they’re going to exclude you, and yeah, they’re going to honk at you. But that doesn’t make them the authority in your life.

The way I see it, if you’re not hurting anyone, just keep on doing what you’re doing. Honk if you agree. 

Social Media Shut Up

Everyone is living a double life.

We all live the life we normally live (commuting to work, watching bad television, snoozing our alarm) and the one we live on social media (partying with our friends, taking beautiful pictures of scenic landscapes, living the quote unquote life.)

However, as the double life implies, we are rarely our true selves in one life or the other. We can’t be two people at once, after all. And to be extremely blunt, no one is perfect, with or without photoshop on their profile pictures.

So, why, pray tell, do I see post after post that goes something like this:



IF YOU LOVE THE (band, actor/actress, movie, album, etc.) THEN YOU CAN’T SIT WITH US OR BE FRIENDS WITH US.

Why? Why is this a thing?

First of all, not everyone has to have the same preference or opinion as you. Do you really want someone to think the exact same way as you all of the time?

But secondly, why wouldn’t you allow someone the opportunity to learn and educate themselves? If you are going to say that you will not associate with people who aren’t feminists for example, you’re limiting yourself and that person as well. What if he or she suddenly understands what it is to be a feminist after talking to you? Or, what if you are shown a different way of thinking because they have a different opinion about feminism in general? A conversation with this person doesn’t mean you have to change what you believe, it just means you are showing another person some respect (which we all need to give a little more of.)

In the end, you’re just making a reverse stereotype. Instead of applying a generality to a group of people, you are singling out one characteristic and avoiding anyone who has it. Why? Why can’t we look at a person as a whole, and say, well he likes Taylor Swift (which I don’t like) but we both love guacamole (which is great.) We all take the good with the bad in our daily life, so why not with people?

Now, granted, I can understand if you are struggling to reconcile deep differences with a person. It may be hard to see eye to eye with a neo-Nazi, for example. But you have something in common with everyone: you are both human. We all are.

And we need to start focusing on that more. We need to concentrate on the fact that we are all writing our own story and we are all just trying to get home. We all have likes and dislikes and loathings and lovings. So, tell me. Why do we go on social media and think, suddenly, that since our opinion has an audience, it is somehow valid and better than everyone else’s? (As I write on a blog emblazoned with my own name…)

The point is, can we step away from social media, with our fiery social (media) justice, and give people a chance to educate themselves before we completely denounce them as ignorant? We have the entire Internet, but it is up to us to seek out the answers and help each other along the way.