As some of you may know, I didn’t post last week.
I didn’t feel like it, to be honest. And even now, I’m wondering why I try. It’s so much easier not to.
But I also think about all the wonderful people who read my blog and who comment on it.
And if there’s one person out there that wants to read my blog, then I’ll write it. (Even though it’s my mom.)
So friendly reminder: it can be hard sometimes. You’re tired. You’re sad. You’re ready for something new.
You ask: when do I give up on this? When do I stop trying? When can I be done?
And I will say: tomorrow. When you’re a little less tired and sad. And you finally realize that you don’t want to give up.
And you don’t.
Because it’s easy to give up. Too easy. It’s so much harder to continue to show up day after day. But that’s why it’s worth it, in the end.
It’s like looking at the night sky and seeing constellations instead of individual stars.
Don’t give up just yet.
I grew up with two fiercely independent, smart, and kind role models: my mother and my sister. And being the youngest, I was obviously impressionable. So I ate up every word of advice on life that my mother and sister could give. And for you tonight, I’ve collected my favorite memories of each of them. To celebrate just two of the women I hold most dear. (I’m laughing even as I write this.)
- The day we set out to hike and accidentally kept walking for 10 miles.
- That time you didn’t know how to open a champagne bottle, so you did the best with what you could.
- Every day you drove me to high school and let me listen to your fall out boy cd.
- When I kissed you on the head before you went into surgery, and you were thoroughly disgusted.
- When you would do my hair and make up before a big school dance but make me sit on the toilet, and you would exasperatingly say, “IM DOING YOUR MASCARA. LOOK UP.”
- When you helped me decide to go to Ireland by talking to me for 45 minutes about the pros and cons.
- Every time we go shopping and encourage each other to buy whatever we want.
- That time you came into my room with the vacuum cleaner to suck up a particularly nasty spider.
- When you tear up because something is so unbelievably happy.
- That time you changed your name to “Betty boop” on your phone and then called the pizza place, who then obviously referred to you as Ms. boop.
Thanks, mom and Jul, for being who you both are. And allowing me to be who I am. Love you both.
I was the recipient of a kind word today. Out of the blue, unasked for, but very necessary.
And you know what? It completely turned my day around. It was incredibly powerful, the effect it had on me. It really did change my whole attitude, and I’m so grateful to the person who gave it to me.
So I’m passing it on to you.
Listen, today might not have been your best day, but it certainly wasn’t your worst. You can do this! I know you can! And if you ever forget, just ask me! If you have to give up today, then try again tomorrow. And keep trying. Because you’re smart, and funny, and kind and this is your life. You need to take charge of it. So get out there, and shine on.
Now pass it on!
I know it’s hard to see the good in the world right now. I know that I have to acknowledge that fact before anything else. But I also know that people are looking for ways to remind themselves of all the love we’re capable of.
And tonight, I’d like to remind you of that. By writing the 20 ways to love. Some may be obvious, but all will be loving:
- Ask someone how their day was.
- Tell someone to be safe on their drive home.
- Make dinner for someone, without being asked.
- Buy them anything, but especially a chocolate bar, just because.
5. Text them a random thought you had about them.
6. Ask them to dinner/lunch/coffee.
7. Knit them a scarf.
8. Call them out of the blue.
9. Create art for them.
10. Hug them tightly.
11. Let them pick the movie to watch.
12. Do a chore for them.
13. Ask them for their favorite things.
14. Kiss them goodnight.
15. Let them wear your clothing.
16. Plan an entire day with them.
17. Be there for them emotionally.
18. Hold their hand.
19. Laugh at their jokes.
20. But most importantly, tell them that you love them. You may not get another chance.
My bridal shower is this weekend. My friends and family have been hard at work planning the entire day (and keeping me away from it all).
And I just want to recognize how much it means to me. How lucky I am. To have loving friends and family who would put aside an entire day just to celebrate a special time in my life.
So all this week I’ll be paying special tribute to all the things I’m grateful for because it’s times like these that we should look around and be thankful for the people in our lives.
It only takes a second to recognize how grateful we are, but it can really mean the difference between a good and a bad day. Try it yourself along with me!