Still Processing 

How do you get from point A to point B?

Well, you plot a course, and after a right or left turn, you’re there. 

How do I do it? 

I stress and tear my hair out at the fact that I’m not at point B, and gee, point A is so far away, and what’s wrong with me that I haven’t gotten to point B yet?

Because I don’t process things. Or I don’t realize that there is a process to things. That I can’t show up and know everything in the universe. And for some reason that actually frustrates me. 

And call it what you will. Call me a millennial, and point out my obsession with instant gratification. (Ever since we invented solar powered calculators, it’s like we just expect the answers to be given to us.) But I’m still completely confounded by the journey. I don’t know that practice makes perfect because I stuck with everything that came to me naturally (reading, writing, dancing).

It’s just that I don’t remember the time when things were hard and I didn’t know how to do something until I learned. I just remember having learned it. 

So, I’m still processing things. And I’m trying not to beat myself up for not knowing things until I know them. Every journey starts with the first step, but I do wish I walked quicker.